Argumentative

Dyani Ramos

English 101

Holly Pappas

Argumentative

In 2011 there were 1.6 million abortions in the United States according to College students site. Fifty one percent of the abortions performed in the United States were performed on woman below the age of 25. Not only are abortion numbers high but so is the rate of teen pregnancies in the United States. If BirthControl was available over the counter for all states this could prevent abortion as well as teen pregnancy.The United States has one of the highest abortion rates out of all of the developing countries, according to college student for life site. I myself am ashamed to hear this.

We have one of the highest abortion rates out of all of the countries and yet 51% of Americans think it’s too easy to get an abortion in America according to Abortion by Dr. RC Sproul. Not only are there far too many abortions in America but there are also far too many teen pregnancies as well. When I was in high school I would say one out of every five teenagers were pregnant. Teenagers are just becoming to learn about life and have not experienced enough nor are they well off enough to care for children. I myself am a young mother and I consider myself a part of that category.The lack of communication between teens and parents is inevitable. As children grow to become teenagers they begin to develop their own thoughts about life whether they are right or wrong.

“During the teenage years, the area of the brain called the prefrontal vortex is developing. This is the part of your brain that is begin your forehead. It’s your thinking cap and judgment center. Elkins explains which means kids can now develop their own ideals and ideas”. According to Web MD why teens rebel.

There you have it! Facts! Teens are now growing into their own people, with their own thoughts. The more their parents tell them not to do something, like have sex the more their prefrontal vortex will disagree and tell them otherwise. No matter how well we raise our children, they are going to do what they want to do. As young children the prefrontal vortex has not developed so children agree with what their parents tell them. “Once it begins to develop teens want to exercise their new skill and they tend to practice on their parents” According to Web MD. Now that we know teens can’t help but rebel- why not get help for them? We are aware that they will begin making their own decisions. We should allow them to be able to go to their doctor and ask for birth control. If a teenager is taking the responsibility to go and get birth control to prevent teen pregnancy or an abortion I am all for it.

As a parent myself it is in fact terrifying to think that teens should be able to do this. We as parents do everything for our kids- we deserve to know…Right?

“Parents must meet their children’s basic needs for food, clothing, housing, medical care and education” according to the family law site.

So we’re required to do all these things, along with things we do on our own as parents because we want to. Like signing them up for extra curricular activities, taking them on trips, to carnivals, etc. It’s hard to think we do all these things out of love and yet people want to give others authority over us as parents. Doctor’s see our children once a year and it’s scary to think they would have the authority over us.

“As parents we have the right to legal custody meaning the ability to make major decisions about our child’s health, education, and religious upbringing” according to the family lawyers site. So of course parents would consider putting a teenager on birth control a major decision in regard to their health so that would be a great argument a concerned parent could use.

In California and also Oregon birthcontrol is available over the counter according to Link. Although Oregon is only available to woman at the age of 18 or older so to me this would not prevent many abortions or teen pregnancies. Luckily California is setting the example all states should follow but not having an age limit to get birthcontrol. This will not only help young teens trying to get birth control without parent consent but it will also help to people without insurance etc. to get the pill. A 2015 study published in Contraception finds 21 percent of low-income women at risk for unplanned pregnancy are more likely to use the pill if it is available without a prescription according to link.

All in all we really need to open our eyes to providing birth control over the counter because this will only help everyone in the the country I don’t see how this could be harmful.We really need to sit back and look at the bigger picture if we actually give in and let them take birth control we can avoid teen pregnancy or even an abortion. Much worst things can happen if we don’t give in on this.

Sites:

Abortion Facts.” Students for Life of America. Students for Life of America. 2016. Web. 20 Apr. 2016.

http://family-law.lawyers.com/children/the-legal-rights-and-responsibilities-of-a-parent.html

http://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/teenagers-why-do-they-rebel

Newsweek Firger, Jennifer.  Birth Control Pill is Now Available in Oregon and California Without Prescription. Newsweek.  2016 Newsweek LLC. 5 May 2016.

 

http://www.amazon.com/Abortion-Rational-Look-Emotional-Issue/dp/1567692095/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1462382517&sr=8-1&keywords=abortion

Portfolio

The Beginning of the Evolution

English 101 has been a great stepping stone for the beginning of my evolution as a writer. I have always loved writing, mainly informally. I graduated high school three years ago so I have not done too much writing since then when it comes to essays or research papers. Before English 101 my writing consisted of emails at work, text messaging, and occasionally writing in my journal. I personally think my strength as a writer is more of creative writing skill like telling a fictional story or even a well elaborated truth which we did not do in this course. A weakness of mine is learning who to use the MLA format for a Work Cited Page. In high school we simply had to list the book, article, or web page with the author and not go into detail like we do now which I still need to work on. I find it difficult for an online course to really grasp it because there are a lot of ways to do this incorrectly which I will need to work on throughout my college career. I thought the course would be structured a little differently. I did like the idea of the theme it helped the course be organized.

I believe I have grown into a better writer in this course. One of the main objectives of the course was to write focused and well developed essays. As I began the course and started working on the Memoir essay I was a little scrambled and I was not focused on my main topic. I had three proposed essays rather than one. I originally spoke about the night my son was born, him being colic as well as the first three months of his life. After some rework, and revisions I was able to maintain a clear focus on the essay theme. I chose this as one of my essays to include in my portfolio because I consider it a strong essay, that is personal and I feel one of the essays included in my portfolio should be a more personal essay for a good introduction to the reader.

Ethnography had to be one of my all time favorite papers to write of all the essays I’ve done even throughout high school. For this essay I observed my co workers we work in cubicles next to each other all day long. I believe I began to have more of an understanding an respect for my co workers after writing this essay. I didn’t realize how much I did not pay attention at work until I was actually placed in a position to have to observe my co workers. One of the main objectives of the course was to formulate appropriate organizational patterns I believe this was a well organized essay.  As I began drafting my essay I knew I wanted to split up the items I wanted to address by days. On day one, I strolled around the office counting cubicles, counting offices, paying attention to color and much more around the office. On day two I focused on describing each of my workers and writing out similarities I had with each of my team members. On day three it was finally time to actually observe and take notes of what the girls said. It was much easier for me to bring the paper together with how organized I was in the days before I began to actually write the paper. Not only did this paper help me realize things around the office I hadn’t cared enough to pay attention too but it helped me get a better understanding for the woman on my team. I believe now that I feel like I know them all a little better it makes it a better work environment.

Text Wrestling was an interesting fun paper to write. I think before this assignment I wouldn’t have even read the article by Jen Senior Why Parents Hate Parenting. I’m glad I got the chance to read it. I think while reading the article I could clearly determine who Senior’s target audience was as this being one of our main objectives of the course. As a parent I kind of took a sarcastic approach as I began to read the article judging from the title. I read the article again and again and I even began to recite it aloud, which was good for me. I truly understood and could relate more and more as I read and re-read the article. This may have been a hard topic for me to really consider text wrestling because I would say I agreed with a lot that Senior had to say.  I even began to think of other issues she could have debated in her article as well. Text Wrestling had to be one of the harder essays as I misunderstood some of the authors statements but I continued to recite the article I had a more clear understanding of what the article’s point was.

Over the course I believe I have done some great evolution as a writer although I still have a lot of work to do. I learned how to focus on a main topic on an essay rather than five. I learned that after some observation you can get to know a person well, you learn what ticks them off, what makes them happy and this will only help build a relationship with others. A very important thing I was reminded of in the course is not to judge, because I judged about Senior’s title I went into the article negatively instead of with an open mind. Which reminds me of the ‘Not to judge a book by it’s cover’ quote. Overall I think the course has strengthened me as a writer and I am able to clearly pinpoint what I need to work on which gives me motivation for progression in English 102.

Memoir

Dyani Ramos

Professor Holly Papas

English 101

Memoir

Sacrifice, Love, Motherhood

One of the most important days of my life had to be February 2nd, 2014. The day before my son was born. The night before I truly knew the meaning of sacrifice for love. It was a cold Sunday night, the night of the super bowl in fact. Of course the Super Bowl was on – I was watching it in my living room with my boyfriend. I was enjoying some typical football food, salty fries and greasy pizza although I was feeling very large, uncomfortable, and mostly tired. Once you’re pregnant know you will not have another good nights sleep after you’re seven months.  My boyfriend and I were home alone my parents went to a friends hour to watch the game. My mom sarcastically warned me before they left “Don’t go into labor while we’re out” and she laughed. Little did she know…

Around 9PM I began having contractions. I wasn’t sure if it was the real thing of Braxton Hicks- which are very painful false contractions that can happen during pregnancy prior to actual labor. I tried to keep myself calm by taking a warm bubble bath to relax me. I paced around the house for a while. Time went by. The Seattle Seahawks won the Superbowl. Around 11PM I was positive he was coming although I was ten days away from my due date. I told my mom and son’s dad that we had to head to the hospital. They thought I was being dramatic and were too tired to deal with me. My mom said  in  a groggy  voice ‘It’s too early to go to the hospital. Are you sure?’ I replied ‘I think so’. I began second guessing myself- am I sure? I have never had a baby before how so I had no clue.

Sure or not I grabbed my bag, and my son’s overpacked diaper bag and we were on our way. My mom followed us in the car. When I arrived at the hospital I felt tired and drained- but believe me this was only the beginning. When I went upstairs I wasn’t dilated enough to be admitted to a maternity room. All I could think was there is no way I’m going home; God forbid they send me home. The nurse thankfully let me stay in the room for 2 hours. After the time passed nothing changed. I showed no progression. The nurse told me I had two options. Option one of two was to go home and ‘wait it out’ which did not sound appealing.

Option 2 was to walk around the hospital and check in with the nurse every half hour.

Option 2 it was! My mother and I did lap after while my boyfriend slept how nice for him. I was feeling hot, tired, stressed, and the constant contractions were not helping. Lap after lap, the white floors and walls began to bother me! I became dizzy feeling like I was being spun in circles in a white room. At one point one contraction was so painful I couldn’t stand I had to hold on to a nearby door. The door was cold as I was in my thin, lovely, blue triangle hospital gown. It was the least bit warming.

Finally after checking in four times at 3AM I showed progression so they were able to admit me. The maternity wing was packed. A ton of babies were coming including mine! I asked the nurse if this was ‘normal’ for them she told me “Whenever there is a storm approaching the more woman come in to deliver babies.” Odd I thought- was it because the woman were nervous about not making it to the hospital? I know we live in New England but it didn’t cross my mind. Or did more woman come in because mother nature had an odd way of making woman go into labor? Who Knows! Saint Luke’s was so packed one woman actually delivered her baby in the hallway because they were out of rooms in the maternity wing were all full. I remember telling my mom ‘Thank God I have a room- I couldn’t imagine delivering a baby in a hallway with no privacy! A nurse had to deliver a baby because the woman could not wait for the doctor to arrive. The nurse in my room looked at me and said “I will not deliver a baby so you will be waiting for the doctor” I laughed and agreed. Secretly thinking she wouldn’t be qualified enough to do so. I was feeling very excited, happy, and nervous all at the same time- so many emotions. Most importantly I was hoping I would be a good mother. How can I manage the stress of parenting which is a full time job along with my full time job?! I am not the first and I will not be the last I convinced myself which gave me comfort.

After hours and hours of waiting my progression came to a screeching halt. The nurse called the doctor in to talk to me. He was bald headed, and had gigantic blue reassuring eyes. He came and sat by the bedside and told me my son’s heart rate began to slow down. He convinced me everything was going to be okay but I needed to have a C section . Terrified, I agreed with him. Even though I did not want a C section my son’s health was more important. The nurses and doctor prepared the room for the C section. My boyfriend suited up in the gear they gave him which made him look like he would be preforming the surgery. I was wheeled over to the room feeling loopy. The surgery was not painful because of all the medication. I couldn’t see  anything, they had me covered which I was thankful for. I remembered lying there and feeling my boyfriend’s tears fall on my face as he watched our son come into the world.

Finally he was here February 3rd,2014 after what seemed like the longest night of my life. I was in recovery while his dad, and my parents both got to hold him – before me. Finally I was able to hold him and I truly believe you have a whole new outlook on life when you have children. You know what true love is when you have children. Although I had a tough pregnancy and a tough night in labor it was clear the joy he brought me holding him for the first time was worth everything I had sacrificed.

We were brought to our room on our first night as parents. Although this night would be a tough one to relive the pain and chaos was worth it. I declare it the best night of our lives. I cherish this night although it was a tough one. After having going through tough labor you become thankful and stronger as a human being for life itself.

Observing at Equity (Ethnography)

Dyani Ramos

Holly Pappas

English 101

May 1, 2016

More Like Family- Ethnography

I consider my job as my second home and my co-workers more like my second family. I work at Equity National and Title Company- 50 Jordan Street, East Providence Rhode Island. I’ve worked here for over three years now. This will be a great place for me to observe considering I’m here at least forty hours a week.

Title companies handle the title work for mortgage companies. We receive an ‘order’ for a property which lists the owners name,  and address and then we send an examiner to the local county to gather all the documents recorded on the property. They collect deeds, mortgages, releases, UCC liens (for solar panels) judgments etc. Once we get the search back, it is reviewed by the underwriter to review everything that was reported in the search. Then the file goes to the title officers (my job) and we need to address any issues on title, like a mortgage that was never released at the county or verifying judgments, obtaining payoffs on liens and so much more. We come across new things every day here. My position is a very high paced position which requires a lot of background in the industry to be successful. It’s said that in order to be a good title officer you would need to practice in the role for at least a year to be well rounded. I recently started the position in January although I have been on this team since last March.

The outside of my office is a large brick building with a gigantic ’50’ on the building (for our address). We have a far too modern sign for our brick building- it’s sleek, blue, with a white back-round and the word ‘equity’ in blue. The sign looks like it should be a sign for a large sky scraper in New York. The inside of our office is very large, and bland. We have a total of 99 cubicles- 95 surround 4 team leader cubes. The cubicles are surrounded by personal offices, one for the CEO, another attorney, and yet another for the owner- who is rarely here, sales team, and the accounting manager. Lastly, the one pop of color in the office a small wall which is bright orange in fact is the office for our human resources manager. The wall also has the word ‘equity’ on it in blue. All of the other walls in the office are plain white. Our cubicles are a light shade of olive green, with dark brown wood desks. We all have two 13 inch monitors on our desks. We also have a dark, gloomy, but resourceful supply room, which contains pens, notebooks, highlighters, envelopes etc. Our office has dark grey carpets that look like they haven’t been cleaned in years- because they haven’t. The office has bright, florescent lights which can give me headaches some days.

My team probably has the worst seats in the office. We sit right by the ‘kitchen’ which has no door. Every morning we hear people’s annoying conversations, hear the blenders going for people’s morning shakes meanwhile we’re reading extensive wills, trusts, mortgages etc. People stop in front of our desks to have conversations as they are walking in or leaving for lunch.  But the best of all has to be the smells…. In the morning we smell disgusting hard boiled eggs, fish in the afternoon, and every other gross food smell you can think of.

My team has six members ranging from age 22 to 55; myself, Kimberly Z., Liz, Kimberly A, Mindy, and Katie. We get along pretty well for the most part but we are here all day together 40 hours a week so no point in not getting along. I would say we all have different personalities although we also share similarities both inside and outside of work which is beneficial. Kim Z is dare I say- my favorite. She has a very colorful personality. She is positive, kind, caring, and a little sarcastic at the same time. Her desk is filled with funny cat memes that are just as sarcastic as she is. She is loved by all coworkers and our clients. She and I work hand in hand with our ‘select clients’ meaning the more particular, smaller companies that may need more hand holding in the refinance process. Liz is my morning buddy- she works 8 to 4 with me and the rest of the team starts later in the day. Liz and I are only a few years apart and we get along really well because we have a lot of similarities. We enjoy fashion, similar shows, and both have two year old sons. She does not have many decorations on her desk, it’s kept very neat and tidy unlike my desk. My friend Kim A and I have some out of work similarities too. I refer to us as the ‘craft queens’ we both enjoy knitting, baking, and other crafts. Her desk has one sole personal picture of her and her husband the rest of her desk is filled with other work related items. Mindy is the ‘mom’ of the group. She has four children so she has the best mom advice. Liz and I are always questioning her about new things we come across, or worries about our children. Mindy’s desk is kept very professional no personal decorations whatsoever. She does not even have work related things posted. Katie on the other hand like me has her desk filled with pictures, she even decorates for Christmas. Katie can be short tempered at times, or snappy but I do believe she is kind at heart.

This week, the week of February 29th to March 4th has by far been one of the most hectic weeks in my three years in the company. Katie is leaving for surgery and Kim A will be out Friday. Unfortunately because of the importance of the title officer role we as a team need to monitor each other emails when we’re out on vacation days. Meanwhile we are booming and don’t even have time for our own emails.

Typical me on a Monday: “Good Morning girls are you ready for this week?” I ask with a big smile on my face.

Mindy ‘Ugh don’t get me started’ her body language is not excited as she also rolls her eyes. I have never met someone who hates Monday’s as much as Mindy.

Liz ‘Monday Mindy is here’ and we all laugh.

Kim Z ‘We are going to do everything we can this week we know it has been so busy we are going to do the best we can.’

Monday goes by without too many issues. Tuesday afternoon Ben (the attorney in the office- who is also my manager’s manager) calls us into his office. We are all afraid. This is the first time since I’ve been on the team that we’ve been called in there.

Ben’s office is tiny. We cram in to close for comfort along with our manager.  He lets us know that some roles were going to switch around for the following day because we are expected to receive something like 100 orders. He gives every one their tasks for the next day.

This is Katie’s last day before her time off. She is upset about the task she takes on. She is typically negative. She replies “I don’t know how much I will be able to get done, I have never done that specific task…” etc.

Liz was working from home so I decide to update her in with the changes for the day via email. She replies she was not too shocked something like this would happen considering how crazy it’s been.

As we leave Ben’s office I try and reassure the girls we will make it though by saying ‘Let’s do this’ after I received blank faces like you just wait. Wednesday is not too bad Kim Z and myself are able to keep up, the other girls not so much. I tell KZ ‘It’s not too bad maybe it won’t be so crazy after all’ she laughs sarcastically but also is positive when saying ‘We will see.’

Thursday was extreme. My words were ‘I did NOT think it would be this crazy with the first day Katie gone, I don’t know how we are going to last two weeks.’

Mindy ‘Seriously this is crazy’ throwing her hands in the air.

My manager comes over to the pod ‘How’s it going?’

Kim A speaks for everyone ‘We are all completely drowning’ at least she is honest….. Kim is a very positive and vibrant person but we just had to let her know what to expect for the week. I shook my head vigorously as she said we were completely drowning.

Friday rolls around, I was both afraid and happy it was Friday. Both Katie and Kim A will be out today. We each have to cover both their emails for three hours, as well as our own.

Mindy is silent majority of her time covering because it’s so intense.

We cover by shifts and I am up next. Overwhelmed, I can not help but be sarcastic at this point we are all  ‘Well luckily for Kim A and Katie they each have one email meanwhile my own emails are up to 27 unread emails’ and then I laughed to try and make a joke of it.

The whole office is intense it’s month end so every team is crazy trying to get loans approved and scheduled to get to closing so we can help our lenders meet the quota for the month.

Kim Z replies, ‘If we don’t just smile and laugh about it we will be sitting at our desk crying so pick up the phone with a smile on your face’. She always knows the right thing to say at exactly the right time.

Liz ‘I think I need to come in and work overtime tomorrow, if not I will pay for it in the long run it’s so crazy right now.’

The office served us lunch Friday in honor of Employee Appreciation Day- I was unable to get up from my desk because I was covering emails and was too stressed to eat lunch at the time any way.

Me “If I can get a sitter I will come in tomorrow it’s too crazy here I can’t keep pulling more files’

Liz mentioning an inside joke ‘I have a New Jersey file- lets see how many possible judgments’ one minute later ’97 pages of judgments I don’t have time for this!’.

Me “I knew you jinxed yourself this morning when you said the largest one you’ve done was only 30 pages’.

Mindy “I am so tired I am becoming burnt out from all the over time I can not work any more over time my brain is becoming fried I can’t think any more. I’m exhausted”

Liz ‘Can I run reverse credit to clear a judgment?’

Me ‘Yes. Can someone come take a look at a file with me?’

Without hesitation Kim A gets up- I ask

‘Does this look like it’s an expired mortgage?’ She reviews ancient mortgage statute with me ‘Yes’ she replies

NO matter how busy we are we always put aside what we’re doing to help one another. This job can sometimes play mind tricks on you so asking someone else’s opinion happens at least five times an hour. Since title has so many different changes and new things to come across we are always having conversations and working together on things because the goal is to get the file searched, cleared, and closed for the customer. Thankfully most of us don’t see it as a competition. We are all at different points in our careers. I look forward to working with these girls every day. We are all overwhelmed but we make it through with positivity and passion.

The positivity both Kim Z and myself bring to the team help us during tough times.  When we begin to be negative the stress seems to trickle down across the girls. Now we are in a better place that everyone is back to work. We have been getting along better because we now have time to work on our own files.

Working together toward one goal helps us be a successful team. Positiveness spreads like wildfire as well as negativeness. As long as we can manage to be positive we will grow more like a family.

Parenting Struggles (Text Wrestling)

Dyani Ramos

English 101

Holly Pappas

Text Wrestling

Parenting Struggles

Parenting does not begin and end with love, there is much more that comes in between. Not only do we love and care for our children but we also deal with the struggles of being a parent as well. We as parents have substantive responsibilities that can cause major stress.  Not only are we responsible for maintaining health and dental insurance, taking after our children 24/7 we feed them, clothe them,  deal with daily tantrums and behavioral issues and much more. Being a parent is a full time job.

 

In ‘All Joy and No Fun – Why Parents Hate Parenting’Jennifer Senior expresses her views on the difficulty of parenting. I believe her target audience was a broad range of adults, adults who are parents and adults who aren’t.  I disagreed with the article instantly as I read the title. I’m a parent myself and I don’t think of the struggles I have as ‘hate’. As I read the article I began to agree with some of Senior’s points.  I would even say Senior made some good arguments but she could have elaborated more on parent duties and struggles in the article.  After reading I had a clearer understanding about what she meant about parents ‘hating’ parenting.

The introduction to the article starts off happily like a fairytale describing the excitement Senior’s two year old son had when he saw her arriving home. He was ecstatic she described him as ‘barreling’ down the street to greet her. Senior was so happy to get this reaction from him as I believe all moms are after a long day. Shortly after they arrive home her son throws a fit when she can’t reconstruct his toy quick enough. Out of frustration he threw his toy as well as hit Senior. Children’s moods change so quickly they are excited one moment and utterly frustrated the next.  They resemble the ups and downs, twists and turns of a rollercoaster.

 

I can relate to tough toddler tantrums. Senior and I  both have a two year old son and deal with similar ups and downs. Just last week when I arrived to pick up my son from day care he was elated to see me. He ran over to me as though he was sprinting in a track meet he screamed ‘mommy mommy’ in his giddy toddler boy voice. This I love as Senior did! When we arrived home he wanted to use the iPad and was instantly frustrated the second he couldn’t unlock it throwing it across the room and breaking down into a tantrum. Although the tantrum was difficult the fulfillment I received when I arrived to get him at day care ten minutes earlier pushed me through the tantrum.

Senior relates to data from psychologists and their studies on parenting. Data proved that parents are less happy than people without children. The author gives examples of parent relationship struggles. It describes the fights we go through over simple things like homework. Senior also describes a clip from a study of 1,540 hours of middle class families ‘The intention of this study was in no way to make the case that parents were unhappy. But one of the postdoctoral fellows who worked on it, himself a father of two, nevertheless described the video data in the Times as “the very purest form of birth control ever devised. Ever.”. I found this quote hilarious. If my family and I were filmed I’m sure people would second guess having kids. Not everyone can realize how much the good times out weigh the bad if they are in the middle of a tough situation like perhaps a toddler tantrum.

Not only does parenting change yourself as a person but it’s also detrimental to a relationship. Parents use so much energy on their children they become tired. According to Kids Health “The resulting sleep deprivation can make you irritable and turn tasks like household chores and errands into ordeals because you have less energy and can’t concentrate” doing the dishes and a couple loads of laundry can be something like the last straw. The stress of parenting makes us short tempered and demanding of our spouses. According to an article on Kids Health  “Sometimes new dads get jealous because the baby takes up so much of mom’s time” we can’t help but devoting so much time to our children but it’s clear our partner suffers.  I have found myself becoming more of a demanding person as Senior suggests typically happens after becoming a mother.

Most adults do in fact choose to have children even though we are aware of the stress it will bring us. The fulfillment being a parent can bring you is like no other feeling “Yet it’s something most of us choose. Indeed, it’s something most of us would say we’d be miserable without” Senior. A large percent of people love the feeling of accomplishment. For instance after working hard on a task at work the pride you receive after like your boss praising you for the task is great. I believe the love, patience, and happiness of having children do in fact outweigh the hard times with our kids. The good times are pure bliss. In order to see the view from the top of a mountain you must struggle and persevere through the hike.

 

 

Work Cited:

Jennifer, Senior. All Joy No Fun Why Parents Hate Parenting. NY Times. New York. New York Media LLC. 26 Apr 2016.

Kids Health. How Becoming Parents Can Affect Your Relationship. Kids Health. 26 Apr 2016.

Parenting Struggles- Text Wrestling

Dyani Ramos

English 101

Holly Pappas

Text Wrestling

Parenting Struggles

Parenting does not begin and end with love, there is much more that comes in between. Not only do we love and care for our children but we also deal with the struggles of being a parent as well. We as parents have substantive responsibilities that can cause major stress.  Not only are we responsible for maintaining health and dental insurance, taking after our children 24/7 we feed them, clothe them,  deal with daily tantrums and behavioral issues and much more. Being a parent is a full time job.

 

In ‘All Joy and No Fun – Why Parents Hate Parenting’Jennifer Senior expresses her views on the difficulty of parenting. I believe her target audience was a broad range of adults, adults who are parents and adults who aren’t.  I disagreed with the article instantly as I read the title. I’m a parent myself and I don’t think of the struggles I have as ‘hate’. As I read the article I began to agree with some of Senior’s points.  I would even say Senior made some good arguments but she could have elaborated more on parent duties and struggles in the article.  After reading I had a clearer understanding about what she meant about parents ‘hating’ parenting.

The introduction to the article starts off happily like a fairytale describing the excitement Senior’s two year old son had when he saw her arriving home. He was ecstatic she described him as ‘barreling’ down the street to greet her. Senior was so happy to get this reaction from him as I believe all moms are after a long day. Shortly after they arrive home her son throws a fit when she can’t reconstruct his toy quick enough. Out of frustration he threw his toy as well as hit Senior. Children’s moods change so quickly they are excited one moment and utterly frustrated the next.  They resemble the ups and downs, twists and turns of a rollercoaster.

 

I can relate to tough toddler tantrums. Senior and I  both have a two year old son and deal with similar ups and downs. Just last week when I arrived to pick up my son from day care he was elated to see me. He ran over to me as though he was sprinting in a track meet he screamed ‘mommy mommy’ in his giddy toddler boy voice. This I love as Senior did! When we arrived home he wanted to use the iPad and was instantly frustrated the second he couldn’t unlock it throwing it across the room and breaking down into a tantrum. Although the tantrum was difficult the fulfillment I received when I arrived to get him at day care ten minutes earlier pushed me through the tantrum.

Senior relates to data from psychologists and their studies on parenting. Data proved that parents are less happy than people without children. The author gives examples of parent relationship struggles. It describes the fights we go through over simple things like homework. Senior also describes a clip from a study of 1,540 hours of middle class families ‘The intention of this study was in no way to make the case that parents were unhappy. But one of the postdoctoral fellows who worked on it, himself a father of two, nevertheless described the video data in the Times as “the very purest form of birth control ever devised. Ever.”. I found this quote hilarious. If my family and I were filmed I’m sure people would second guess having kids. Not everyone can realize how much the good times out weigh the bad if they are in the middle of a tough situation like perhaps a toddler tantrum.

Not only does parenting change yourself as a person but it’s also detrimental to a relationship. Parents use so much energy on their children they become tired. According to Kids Health “The resulting sleep deprivation can make you irritable and turn tasks like household chores and errands into ordeals because you have less energy and can’t concentrate” doing the dishes and a couple loads of laundry can be something like the last straw. The stress of parenting makes us short tempered and demanding of our spouses. According to an article on Kids Health  “Sometimes new dads get jealous because the baby takes up so much of mom’s time” we can’t help but devoting so much time to our children but it’s clear our partner suffers.  I have found myself becoming more of a demanding person as Senior suggests typically happens after becoming a mother.

Most adults do in fact choose to have children even though we are aware of the stress it will bring us. The fulfillment being a parent can bring you is like no other feeling “Yet it’s something most of us choose. Indeed, it’s something most of us would say we’d be miserable without” Senior. A large percent of people love the feeling of accomplishment. For instance after working hard on a task at work the pride you receive after like your boss praising you for the task is great. I believe the love, patience, and happiness of having children do in fact outweigh the hard times with our kids. The good times are pure bliss. In order to see the view from the top of a mountain you must struggle and persevere through the hike.

 

Work Cited

Senior, Jennifer. “All Joy No Fun”. NY Mag. New York. New York Media LLC. 4 Jul 2010. 20 Apr 2016.

Kids Health. “How Becoming a Parent Can Affect your Relationship” Kids Health. The Nemours Foundation. 22 Apr 2016.

Dyani Ramos

Holly Pappas

English 101

May 1, 2016

More Like Family- Ethnography

I consider my job as my second home and my co-workers more like my second family. I work at Equity National and Title Company- 50 Jordan Street, East Providence Rhode Island. I’ve worked here for over three years now. This will be a great place for me to observe considering I’m here at least forty hours a week.

Title companies handle the title work for mortgage companies. We receive an ‘order’ for a property which lists the owners name,  and address and then we send an examiner to the local county to gather all the documents recorded on the property. They collect deeds, mortgages, releases, UCC liens (for solar panels) judgments etc. Once we get the search back, it is reviewed by the underwriter to review everything that was reported in the search. Then the file goes to the title officers (my job) and we need to address any issues on title, like a mortgage that was never released at the county or verifying judgments, obtaining payoffs on liens and so much more. We come across new things every day here. My position is a very high paced position which requires a lot of background in the industry to be successful. It’s said that in order to be a good title officer you would need to practice in the role for at least a year to be well rounded. I recently started the position in January although I have been on this team since last March.

The outside of my office is a large brick building with a gigantic ’50’ on the building (for our address). We have a far too modern sign for our brick building- it’s sleek, blue, with a white back-round and the word ‘equity’ in blue. The sign looks like it should be a sign for a large sky scraper in New York. The inside of our office is very large, and bland. We have a total of 99 cubicles- 95 surround 4 team leader cubes. The cubicles are surrounded by personal offices, one for the CEO, another attorney, and yet another for the owner- who is rarely here, sales team, and the accounting manager. Lastly, the one pop of color in the office a small wall which is bright orange in fact is the office for our human resources manager. The wall also has the word ‘equity’ on it in blue. All of the other walls in the office are plain white. Our cubicles are a light shade of olive green, with dark brown wood desks. We all have two 13 inch monitors on our desks. We also have a dark, gloomy, but resourceful supply room, which contains pens, notebooks, highlighters, envelopes etc. Our office has dark grey carpets that look like they haven’t been cleaned in years- because they haven’t. The office has bright, florescent lights which can give me headaches some days.

My team probably has the worst seats in the office. We sit right by the ‘kitchen’ which has no door. Every morning we hear people’s annoying conversations, hear the blenders going for people’s morning shakes meanwhile we’re reading extensive wills, trusts, mortgages etc. People stop in front of our desks to have conversations as they are walking in or leaving for lunch.  But the best of all has to be the smells…. In the morning we smell disgusting hard boiled eggs, fish in the afternoon, and every other gross food smell you can think of.

My team has six members ranging from age 22 to 55; myself, Kimberly Z., Liz, Kimberly A, Mindy, and Katie. We get along pretty well for the most part but we are here all day together 40 hours a week so no point in not getting along. I would say we all have different personalities although we also share similarities both inside and outside of work which is beneficial. Kim Z is dare I say- my favorite. She has a very colorful personality. She is positive, kind, caring, and a little sarcastic at the same time. Her desk is filled with funny cat memes that are just as sarcastic as she is. She is loved by all coworkers and our clients. She and I work hand in hand with our ‘select clients’ meaning the more particular, smaller companies that may need more hand holding in the refinance process. Liz is my morning buddy- she works 8 to 4 with me and the rest of the team starts later in the day. Liz and I are only a few years apart and we get along really well because we have a lot of similarities. We enjoy fashion, similar shows, and both have two year old sons. She does not have many decorations on her desk, it’s kept very neat and tidy unlike my desk. My friend Kim A and I have some out of work similarities too. I refer to us as the ‘craft queens’ we both enjoy knitting, baking, and other crafts. Her desk has one sole personal picture of her and her husband the rest of her desk is filled with other work related items. Mindy is the ‘mom’ of the group. She has four children so she has the best mom advice. Liz and I are always questioning her about new things we come across, or worries about our children. Mindy’s desk is kept very professional no personal decorations whatsoever. She does not even have work related things posted. Katie on the other hand like me has her desk filled with pictures, she even decorates for Christmas. Katie can be short tempered at times, or snappy but I do believe she is kind at heart.

This week, the week of February 29th to March 4th has by far been one of the most hectic weeks in my three years in the company. Katie is leaving for surgery and Kim A will be out Friday. Unfortunately because of the importance of the title officer role we as a team need to monitor each other emails when we’re out on vacation days. Meanwhile we are booming and don’t even have time for our own emails.

Typical me on a Monday: “Good Morning girls are you ready for this week?” I ask with a big smile on my face.

Mindy ‘Ugh don’t get me started’ her body language is not excited as she also rolls her eyes. I have never met someone who hates Monday’s as much as Mindy.

Liz ‘Monday Mindy is here’ and we all laugh.

Kim Z ‘We are going to do everything we can this week we know it has been so busy we are going to do the best we can.’

Monday goes by without too many issues. Tuesday afternoon Ben (the attorney in the office- who is also my manager’s manager) calls us into his office. We are all afraid. This is the first time since I’ve been on the team that we’ve been called in there.

Ben’s office is tiny. We cram in to close for comfort along with our manager.  He lets us know that some roles were going to switch around for the following day because we are expected to receive something like 100 orders. He gives every one their tasks for the next day.

This is Katie’s last day before her time off. She is upset about the task she takes on. She is typically negative. She replies “I don’t know how much I will be able to get done, I have never done that specific task…” etc.

Liz was working from home so I decide to update her in with the changes for the day via email. She replies she was not too shocked something like this would happen considering how crazy it’s been.

As we leave Ben’s office I try and reassure the girls we will make it though by saying ‘Let’s do this’ after I received blank faces like you just wait. Wednesday is not too bad Kim Z and myself are able to keep up, the other girls not so much. I tell KZ ‘It’s not too bad maybe it won’t be so crazy after all’ she laughs sarcastically but also is positive when saying ‘We will see.’

Thursday was extreme. My words were ‘I did NOT think it would be this crazy with the first day Katie gone, I don’t know how we are going to last two weeks.’

Mindy ‘Seriously this is crazy’ throwing her hands in the air.

My manager comes over to the pod ‘How’s it going?’

Kim A speaks for everyone ‘We are all completely drowning’ at least she is honest….. Kim is a very positive and vibrant person but we just had to let her know what to expect for the week. I shook my head vigorously as she said we were completely drowning.

Friday rolls around, I was both afraid and happy it was Friday. Both Katie and Kim A will be out today. We each have to cover both their emails for three hours, as well as our own.

Mindy is silent majority of her time covering because it’s so intense.

We cover by shifts and I am up next. Overwhelmed, I can not help but be sarcastic at this point we are all  ‘Well luckily for Kim A and Katie they each have one email meanwhile my own emails are up to 27 unread emails’ and then I laughed to try and make a joke of it.

The whole office is intense it’s month end so every team is crazy trying to get loans approved and scheduled to get to closing so we can help our lenders meet the quota for the month.

Kim Z replies, ‘If we don’t just smile and laugh about it we will be sitting at our desk crying so pick up the phone with a smile on your face’. She always knows the right thing to say at exactly the right time.

Liz ‘I think I need to come in and work overtime tomorrow, if not I will pay for it in the long run it’s so crazy right now.’

The office served us lunch Friday in honor of Employee Appreciation Day- I was unable to get up from my desk because I was covering emails and was too stressed to eat lunch at the time any way.

Me “If I can get a sitter I will come in tomorrow it’s too crazy here I can’t keep pulling more files’

Liz mentioning an inside joke ‘I have a New Jersey file- lets see how many possible judgments’ one minute later ’97 pages of judgments I don’t have time for this!’.

Me “I knew you jinxed yourself this morning when you said the largest one you’ve done was only 30 pages’.

Mindy “I am so tired I am becoming burnt out from all the over time I can not work any more over time my brain is becoming fried I can’t think any more. I’m exhausted”

Liz ‘Can I run reverse credit to clear a judgment?’

Me ‘Yes. Can someone come take a look at a file with me?’

Without hesitation Kim A gets up- I ask

‘Does this look like it’s an expired mortgage?’ She reviews ancient mortgage statute with me ‘Yes’ she replies

NO matter how busy we are we always put aside what we’re doing to help one another. This job can sometimes play mind tricks on you so asking someone else’s opinion happens at least five times an hour. Since title has so many different changes and new things to come across we are always having conversations and working together on things because the goal is to get the file searched, cleared, and closed for the customer. Thankfully most of us don’t see it as a competition. We are all at different points in our careers. I look forward to working with these girls every day. We are all overwhelmed but we make it through with positivity and passion.

The positivity both Kim Z and myself bring to the team help us during tough times.  When we begin to be negative the stress seems to trickle down across the girls. Now we are in a better place that everyone is back to work. We have been getting along better because we now have time to work on our own files.

Working together toward one goal helps us be a successful team. Positiveness spreads like wildfire as well as negativeness. As long as we can manage to be positive we will grow more like a family.

Sacrifice, Love and Motherhood- Memoir Revised

Dyani Ramos

Professor Holly Papas

English 101

Memoir

Sacrifice, Love, Motherhood

One of the most important days of my life had to be February 2nd, 2014. The day before my son was born. The night before I truly knew the meaning of sacrifice for love. It was a cold Sunday night, the night of the super bowl in fact. Of course the Super Bowl was on – I was watching it in my living room with my boyfriend. I was enjoying some typical football food, salty fries and greasy pizza although I was feeling very large, uncomfortable, and mostly tired. Once you’re pregnant know you will not have another good nights sleep after you’re seven months.  My boyfriend and I were home alone my parents went to a friends hour to watch the game. My mom sarcastically warned me before they left “Don’t go into labor while we’re out” and she laughed. Little did she know…

Around 9PM I began having contractions. I wasn’t sure if it was the real thing of Braxton Hicks- which are very painful false contractions that can happen during pregnancy prior to actual labor. I tried to keep myself calm by taking a warm bubble bath to relax me. I paced around the house for a while. Time went by. The Seattle Seahawks won the Superbowl. Around 11PM I was positive he was coming although I was ten days away from my due date. I told my mom and son’s dad that we had to head to the hospital. They thought I was being dramatic and were too tired to deal with me. My mom said  in  a groggy  voice ‘It’s too early to go to the hospital. Are you sure?’ I replied ‘I think so’. I began second guessing myself- am I sure? I have never had a baby before how so I had no clue.

Sure or not I grabbed my bag, and my son’s overpacked diaper bag and we were on our way. My mom followed us in the car. When I arrived at the hospital I felt tired and drained- but believe me this was only the beginning. When I went upstairs I wasn’t dilated enough to be admitted to a maternity room. All I could think was there is no way I’m going home; God forbid they send me home. The nurse thankfully let me stay in the room for 2 hours. After the time passed nothing changed. I showed no progression. The nurse told me I had two options. Option one of two was to go home and ‘wait it out’ which did not sound appealing.

Option 2 was to walk around the hospital and check in with the nurse every half hour.

Option 2 it was! My mother and I did lap after while my boyfriend slept how nice for him. I was feeling hot, tired, stressed, and the constant contractions were not helping. Lap after lap, the white floors and walls began to bother me! I became dizzy feeling like I was being spun in circles in a white room. At one point one contraction was so painful I couldn’t stand I had to hold on to a nearby door. The door was cold as I was in my thin, lovely, blue triangle hospital gown. It was the least bit warming.

Finally after checking in four times at 3AM I showed progression so they were able to admit me. The maternity wing was packed. A ton of babies were coming including mine! I asked the nurse if this was ‘normal’ for them she told me “Whenever there is a storm approaching the more woman come in to deliver babies.” Odd I thought- was it because the woman were nervous about not making it to the hospital? I know we live in New England but it didn’t cross my mind. Or did more woman come in because mother nature had an odd way of making woman go into labor? Who Knows! Saint Luke’s was so packed one woman actually delivered her baby in the hallway because they were out of rooms in the maternity wing were all full. I remember telling my mom ‘Thank God I have a room- I couldn’t imagine delivering a baby in a hallway with no privacy! A nurse had to deliver a baby because the woman could not wait for the doctor to arrive. The nurse in my room looked at me and said “I will not deliver a baby so you will be waiting for the doctor” I laughed and agreed. Secretly thinking she wouldn’t be qualified enough to do so. I was feeling very excited, happy, and nervous all at the same time- so many emotions. Most importantly I was hoping I would be a good mother. How can I manage the stress of parenting which is a full time job along with my full time job?! I am not the first and I will not be the last I convinced myself which gave me comfort.

After hours and hours of waiting my progression came to a screeching halt. The nurse called the doctor in to talk to me. He was bald headed, and had gigantic blue reassuring eyes. He came and sat by the bedside and told me my son’s heart rate began to slow down. He convinced me everything was going to be okay but I needed to have a C section . Terrified, I agreed with him. Even though I did not want a C section my son’s health was more important. The nurses and doctor prepared the room for the C section. My boyfriend suited up in the gear they gave him which made him look like he would be preforming the surgery. I was wheeled over to the room feeling loopy. The surgery was not painful because of all the medication. I couldn’t see  anything, they had me covered which I was thankful for. I remembered lying there and feeling my boyfriend’s tears fall on my face as he watched our son come into the world.

Finally he was here February 3rd,2014 after what seemed like the longest night of my life. I was in recovery while his dad, and my parents both got to hold him – before me. Finally I was able to hold him and I truly believe you have a whole new outlook on life when you have children. You know what true love is when you have children. Although I had a tough pregnancy and a tough night in labor it was clear the joy he brought me holding him for the first time was worth everything I had sacrificed.

We were brought to our room on our first night as parents. Although this night would be a tough one to relive the pain and chaos was worth it. I declare it the best night of our lives. I cherish this night although it was a tough one. After having going through tough labor you become thankful and stronger as a human being for life itself.

Argumentative Rough Draft

Dyani Ramos

English 101

Holly Pappas

Argumentative

In 2011 there were 1.6 million abortions in the United States according to College students site. Fifty one percent of the abortions performed in the United States were performed on woman below the age of 25.

These numbers are outrageous, to think that is like an additional 1.6 million murders a year. We as people need to come together to brainstorm how we can decrease these numbers. I believe if teens were able to reach out to their doctor’s for birth control without parent consent we would be able to prevent thousands of abortions a year as well as teen pregnancies. I myself am pro life so I do think this would help support our nation. The United States has one of the highest abortion rates out of all of the developing countries, according to college student for life site. I myself am ashamed to hear this.

The lack of communication between teens and parents is inevitable. As children grow to become teenagers they begin to develop their own thoughts about life whether they are right or wrong.

“During the teenage years, the area of the brain called the prefrontal vortex is developing. This is the part of your brain that is begin your forehead. It’s your thinking cap and judgment center. Elkins explains which means kids can now develop their own ideals and ideas”. According to Web MD why teens rebel.

There you have it! Facts! Teens are now growing into their own people, with their own thoughts. The more their parents tell them not to do something, like have sex the more their prefrontal vortex will disagree and tell them otherwise. No matter how well we raise our children, they are going to do what they want to do. As young children the prefrontal vortex has not developed so children agree with what their parents tell them. “Once it begins to develop teens want to exercise their new skill and they tend to practice on their parents” According to Web MD. Now that we know teens can’t help but rebel- why not get help for them? We are aware that they will begin making their own decisions. We should allow them to be able to go to their doctor and ask for birth control. If a teenager is taking the responsibility to go and get birth control to prevent teen pregnancy or an abortion I am all for it.

As a parent myself it is in fact terrifying to think that teens should be able to do this. We as parents do everything for our kids- we deserve to know…Right?

“Parents must meet their children’s basic needs for food, clothing, housing, medical care and education” according to the family law site.

So we’re required to do all these things, along with things we do on our own as parents because we want to. Like signing them up for extra curricular activities, taking them on trips, to carnivals, etc. It’s hard to think we do all these things out of love and yet people want to give others authority over us as parents. Doctor’s see our children once a year and it’s scary to think they would have the authority over us.

“As parents we have the right to legal custody meaning the ability to make major decisions about our child’s health, education, and religious upbringing” according to the family lawyers site. So of course parents would consider putting a teenager on birth control a major decision in regard to their health so that would be a great argument a concerned parent could use.

When I was in high school a classmate of mine had a headache her parent had to physically come into the school for their child to come into the school for their child to take an advil, or aspirin. This of course seemed crazy to their parents. I went to New Bedford High School, a public school at that. It’s funny to think at a public school a parent had to come in for their teenager to take an advil and yet people think it’s okay for others to make a decision as crucial as a teenager taking birth control. This is a hard idea to grasp. According to the politifact site it’s a FL state law that “a students parent needs to submit a written request with the medicine that permits a trained school official to administer a dose. The note must also explain why the medication must be taken during the school day”. Meanwhile we find that teens are having abortions without parent consent. It’s hard to think of this as parents because of course we feel we have the right to know. We really need to sit back and look at the bigger picture if we actually give in and let them take birth control we can avoid teen pregnancy or even an abortion. Much worst things can happen if we don’t give in on this.

Sites:

Abortion Facts.” Students for Life of America. Students for Life of America. 2016. Web. 20 Apr. 2016.

http://family-law.lawyers.com/children/the-legal-rights-and-responsibilities-of-a-parent.html

http://www.webmd.com/parenting/features/teenagers-why-do-they-rebel

http://www.politifact.com/florida/statements/2011/may/17/steve-oelrich/state-senator-claims-school-nurses-cant-give-aspir/

 

I just saw your note about needing paper based as well, I will include paper based ones in my final draft. Please let me know if I should avoid using another two references or if I should remove one of the ones I have

Text Wrestling final draft

Dyani Ramos

English 101

Holly Pappas

Text Wrestling

 

In ‘All Joy and No Fun’ Jennifer Senior expresses why parents despise parenting.  Senior used some good details describing her views on the difficulties of parenting. I believe her target audience was a broad range of adults, adults who are parents and adults who aren’t.  As awful as it sounds it’s true. I disagreed with the article instantly as I read the title. I had plenty of arguments against not ‘hating parenting’ but as I read further I began to agree.  I would even say Senior made some good arguments but she could have elaborated more on parent duties and struggles in the article.  We as parents have substantive responsibilities that can cause major stress.  Not only are we responsible for maintaining health and dental insurance, taking after our children 24/7. We feed them, cloth them,  deal with daily tantrums and behavioral issues and much more. Being a parent is a full time job. After reading I had a clearer understanding about what she meant about parents ‘hating’ parenting.

The introduction to the article starts off happily like a fairytale describing the excitement Senior’s two year old son had when he saw her arriving home. He was ecstatic she described him as ‘barreling’ down the street to greet her. Senior was so happy to get this reaction from him as I believe all moms are after a long day. Shortly after they arrive home her son throws a fit when she can’t reconstruct his toy quick enough. Out of frustration he threw his toy as well as hit Senior. Children’s moods change so quickly they are excited one moment and utterly frustrated the next.  They resemble the ups and downs, twists and turns of a rollercoaster.

 

I can relate to these toddler tantrums, like Senior I have a two year old son and deal with similar ups and downs. Just last week when I arrived to pick up my son from day care he was elated to see me. He ran over to me like he was sprinting in a track meet he screamed ‘mommy mommy’ in his giddy toddler boy voice. This I love as Senior did! When we arrived home he wanted to use the iPad and was instantly frustrated the second he couldn’t unlock it throwing it across the room and breaking down into a tantrum. Although the tantrum was difficult the fulfillment I received when I arrived to get him at day care ten minutes earlier pushed me through the tantrum.

Senior relates to data from psychologists and their studies on parenting. Data proved that parents are less happy than people without children. The author gives examples of parent relationship struggles. It describes the fights we go through over simple things like homework. Senior also describes a clip from a study of 1,540 hours of middle class families ‘The intention of this study was in no way to make the case that parents were unhappy. But one of the postdoctoral fellows who worked on it, himself a father of two, nevertheless described the video data in the Times as “the very purest form of birth control ever devised. Ever.”. I found this quote hilarious. If me an my family were filmed I’m sure people would second guess having kids. Not everyone can realize how much the good times out weigh the bad if they are in the middle of a tough situation like prehaps a toddler tantrum.

Not only does parenting change yourself as a person but it’s also detrimental to a relationship. Parents use so much energy on their children they become tired. The stress of parenting makes us short tempered and demanding of our spouses. According to an article on Kids Health  ‘Sometimes new dads get jealous because the baby takes up so much of mom’s time’ we can’t help but devoting so much time to our children but it’s clear our partner suffers. I have found myself becoming more of a demanding person as Senior suggests typically happens after becoming a mother.

“Yet it’s something most of us choose. Indeed, it’s something most of us would say we’d be miserable without” Senior.

I misunderstood this quote the first couple of times I read the article I assumed Senior was describing drinking and not actually being a parent. After rereading the article aloud it’s clear to see Senior is describing being a parent. Most adults do in fact choose to have children even though we are aware of the stress it will bring us. The fulfillment being a parent can bring you is like no other feeling. A large percent of people like feeling accomplished after working hard for something. Like a job for instance after working hard on a task at work the pride you receive after your boss praising you for the task is great. I believe the love, patience, and happiness of having children do in fact outweigh the hard times with our kids. The good times are pure bliss.

 

Jennifer Senior New York Times All Joy and No Fun link:

http://nymag.com/news/features/67024/index2.html

Kids Health site

http://kidshealth.org/en/parents/becoming-parents.html